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Tag "bridesmaids"

Photo: flickafame @ flickr.com

For your reading pleasure!
Should we tell little girls they’re pretty? I mean, of course we should! Right? Who doesn’t love the feeling of an adoring looker ogling at the outfit which took you like, FOREVER TO PUT TOGETHER OMG. Compliments are like big soul injections that pump you full of self esteem juice. That person actually noticed that I exfoliated – squee! But does a focus on a person’s outward beauty devalue their inner beauty?

Teaching girls that their appearance is the first thing you notice tells them that looks are more important than anything. It sets them up for dieting at age 5 and foundation at age 11 and boob jobs at 17 and Botox at 23. As our cultural imperative for girls to be hot 24/7 has become the new normal, American women have become increasingly unhappy. What’s missing? A life of meaning, a life of ideas and reading books and being valued for our thoughts and accomplishments.

Word.

Whilst we’re on the topic of self-image, Liz Jones has set off a firecracker with her criticism of a young girl’s choice to forego wearing makeup. She argues that an impeccable appearance is mandatory for front of house positions, and any deviation from any implicit and explicit uniform codes is an insult to the company you work for, and your customers.

Women who feel no compunction to improve what nature bestowed upon them are, in my experience, arrogant, lazy or deluded, and frequently all three.

This is especially true in the service industry, where a bare face is no more acceptable than a dentist with halitosis. It tells me that a woman doesn’t really care what others think of her.

Wearing even a little make-up shows respect to others, demonstrating on the outside that you are professional, a stickler for detail, someone who doesn’t cut corners.But there is one aspect of Ms Stark’s case that I do find puzzling: why does any intelligent women (whatever her workplace) need a manual to tell them what is or isn’t acceptable. Surely common sense should do?

This reminds me of something Gala Darling said in her podcast Love and Sequins. She says that keeping up appearances is just good manners. I work in retail. I wear makeup. I wear nice clothes. The world would be a perfect place if strangers could peer into our souls and tell that we have integrity, that we’re intelligent and caring individuals. Unfortunately, this isn’t how customer service works. You are judged upon your presentation, and this applies to other social situations too, if not most. I admire any girl who has the guts to walk past the mirror in the morning and be completely comfortable in her skin, head held high with a natural self confidence. However, I just haven’t reached that point yet (and I also really, really love wearing bright red lipstick!) What are your opinions? How much makeup do you wear to work?

Gastronimical girl power! Could this be the breakfast of feminist champions? Take a look at this tiny woman who won a hot-dog eating contest.

Kristin Wigg as the hot but super awkward Annie with the cookie-cutter hair cut. Ugh.

Aaaaaannndd….yet another article on Bridesmaids, which I totally thought was over-hyped, but then I changed my mind about half-way through the movie and decided I loved its’ honest display of how complex, skrewy yet incredibly awesome and supportive female relationships can be. I saw a band-wagon travelling past and I have jumped straight on. I really appreciated how the token unattractive side-kicks were actually more realistic in the looks department, because honestly, it’s kind of an insult when Amanda Seyfried, Anne Hathaway and Emma Watson play that part. I really hope the success of Bridesmaids paves the success for more female comedians who don’t rely upon their Oscar-ready looks.

Why blogs for women don’t do shit for equality. I’m going to play the devil’s advocate here. I’d have to say this blog is exclusive – it’s written by a female, for other females, and doesn’t really take into account a male audience. Susannah Breslin, whom I don’t usually agree with but I consider an awesomely fierce superwoman regardless, argues that this withdrawal from the real world and into ‘girl world’ is actually counterproductive. I used to live near the beach in Sydney, and there was this amazing women’s pool that I used to frequent in the summer. It was a place where you could go and sit and relax in the company of other women and not have to worry about getting perved on by creepy guys and just be you. I really liked going there because most women dropped their judgmental egos at the door, so there was less pressure to have a bangin’ bikini body. You were at complete liberty to let those jiggly bits do their thang and not have to worry about an audience. So I do believe we need these spaces. I do believe they are havens. What do you think of blogs for women? Or of spaces for women in general?

Photo: Jezebel.com

Lady Ga-Ga: brazen opportunist or LGBT warrior? I will admit with my duck-taped nipples aimed high that I am a fan of the Ga-Ga. She has a talent for wearing outrageous get-ups, manipulating the media with imaginary penises and writing ridiculous songs that are just. So. Damned. Catchy! In her interview with The Advocate, Gaga says she’s bisexual. Personally, I feel bisexuals cop a lot of flack. They represent the ‘other’. They’re not gay, they’re not straight. How do you pigeon hole them? They are neither black nor white, bu encompass both sides of the sexuality spectrum. So why the lack of support for bisexuals? I mean, the LGBT symbol is a rainbow for diversity, right?

This up and coming documentary about body image in the media looks interesting, and I like that it targets women of all ages and not just young girls.

This is the show that is on every lesbian’s mind this week. The Candy Bar Girls appears to be a British carbon copy of The Real L Word, but don’t judge it until you see it. Candy Bar Girls is a lot more of a docu-style reality television show, with a Big Brother style voice over narrating with this slightly David Attenborough tone (Ah! And here you have the lesbian in her natural habitat!) and for those reasons seems a lot less forced than The Real L Word. Another well-scripted reality television show, or an actual chance to transgress the lesbian stereotype bla bla bla yadda yadda patriarchy prejudice hoojey-ma-flop. Check out the cringe-worthy promo below, but then go and watch the whole thing.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yuGKuG3IUwo]

Oh and check this out – FIGHT CLUB FOR THE 20TH CENTURY LADY.

Photo: Powerhouse Museum

Happy Sunday ladies! x

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Elsewhere in the blogosphere…

I love a good visualised pun! Photo via AllTop

Purple Power delivers an almighty blow to inequality as NY State legalises gay marriage!  Yesterday was a day to mark history (and herstory!). However, the state law is buried under a messy heap of federal legislation, which might mean that all the young and hot things in love out there might not be getting a break on their taxes.

I Am Not My Uterus – This is the blog post that had the Twitter kids slinging mud pies at each other all week. Clem Bastow’s article in defense of deliberately barren women polarised the blogosphere into two groups – those already on a vitally important errand to Babyco, and those who’d rather toss the baby out with the bath water (kidding! Kind of). Women who’ve remained childless rallied in defense of Clem (myself included), whilst mothers and fathers alike saw it as an attack on their choices, an immoral decision, or clearly in breach of what mother nature intended.

Miss Bastow, you would be best to simply stay silent rather than use your words to spread your own negativity, weirdness and confusion. Too many young women (and men) have been encouraged to supress their natural inclinations by the likes of you to their regret latter.

The reality of nature can not be altered by newspapers articles: reliable female fertillity is only between the ages of about 18-35 and once the opportunity is gone, it is gone forever. Young men and women waste enough time building a carear without you demoralising them.

Coming from a family of women who have all decided to marry and have children late (or sometimes, not at all), any plans for me personally getting up the duff are yet to be conceived. However, but the government focuses on working families, and even Barbie gets pregnant, I can’t help but feel that it’s expected of me. However, doesn’t everyone feel as though something is expected of them? Women with children feel pressured to raise perfect children and somehow climb the corporate ladder simultaneously, whilst women without children feel like they’re being vilified for putting themselves first. Whether you’re a mother or not, women are defined by their (lack of) children.
Unravelling Blake Lively – Is it a bubbly facade? What is this amazonian beauty like when the camera isn’t rolling? Just who is this blonde icon with enough charm to get the Queen of England naked? Can she stand on her own two feet or does she need to lean on the likes of Leo and teeter on her Loubotins to get ahead? Blake Lively represents a sort of obsession with celebrity. She’s seemingly perfect – a bangin’ body fit for a swimsuit campaign, she’s tight with the emperor and empress of fashion themselves, Karl Lagerfield and Anna Wintour, and also has claim to the lead role in the hottest teen drama since we were welcomed to the OC, bitch. And she has really, really pretty hair. But is she as credible as she seems? Can she act? Can she do the splits? How much wood would a Blake Lively chuck if a Blake lively could chuck wood?

Blake has effectively created a brand for herself. She’s a hustler, climbing up that A-List ladder towards shooting-stardom. She’s working it because she realises that it’s a long way to the top if you want to rock and roll, and you can’t get by without a little help from your Hollywood friends. And if her tabloid covers are anything to go by, it appears to be working. You know you love her.

Ms. Magazine interviews everyone’s favourite huggable green gargantuan, Feminist Hulk. Hulk talks about endless waves of loving smash, his effective abuse of the caps-lock, and the never ending fight to destroy bull-shit.
The sexually abusive tradie as a stereotype – Bitch magazine discusses the prescriptive stereotype of the objectifying construction worker. Is it a self-fulfilling prophecy? Is it a case of having the name so adopting the game?

It’s probably for this reason that working class men are complained about so frequently at talks on street harassment, depicted alongside news articles and blog posts about the issue, and featured in anti-street harassment videos – all of which reify the idea that working class men are harassers. This classist framework really bothers me. Maybe it’s because I grew up working class and my step-father is a truck driver — a profession that’s often perceived as being full of men who demonstrate lewd behavior (a stereotype that contributes to the erasure of the growing number (5%) of women in the industry, but I digress) — that I am resistant to such overarching characterizations. My familiarity with men in these fields makes me sympathetic to arguments of perception vs. intention. Social behaviors differ across class identification, and what may be deemed “crass” or “trashy” or “inappropriate” according to middle or upper class values might be entirely acceptable in my family’s neck of the woods. So, whose standards should get top billing?

Photo: AP/Tina Fineberg via Bitch Media

Another Bridesmaids review. I couldn’t not mention Kristin’s Wigg’s debut film. Most reviews are so quick to confirm that Bridesmaids is so cool! Because it’s like the Hangover! But for chicks! It has fart jokes AND Rose Bryne! Winning! This one’s for those who aren’t stuck in the body of a teenage boy and are a little apprehensive about seeing the female cinematic incarnation of a Judd Appatow film.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nrRd2QSsGc4]

Style Bloggers and the Form/Function debate (and no, I’m not being ironic) – Are they more than just a pretty face? Are style blogs narcissistic mediums for cashed up clothes horses? Are bloggers lives a precious commodity? Could they die in a freak gasoline accident?  Fashion blogs are another form of fashion escapism, except much more affordable, accessible and personable. They blur the line between consumer culture and personal gratification with their diary-like form. We want to know the chick in the knitted jumper (isn’t even Russh employing this personability into their magazine shoots now?), but we also love honest fashion advice. We imagine that the blogger is just like us, although it might not always be the case (many already have profiles within the fashion industry or connections of the monetary or human variety). “Fashion bloggers,” argues author Lauren Burvill, “are undeniably successful. But at what price to the industry?” I don’t think they’re costing the industry – they’re just a new guarde of stylists.

Photo: Gary Pepper Vintage

BFFs are like a good wine – they get better with age.

“Humans are hard-wired to attach in a non-romantic way. There are evolutionary advantages for women to bond: to take care of each other, to provide a community and share responsibilities that increase the likelihood of survival,” Saltz says. “But friendships also fend off loneliness and depression.” – Gail Saltz, clinical associate professor of psychiatry at New York-Presbyterian Hospital/Weill Cornell Medical Center.

S.E Smith from This ‘Aint Livin’ talks about sexism and the female journalist. It’s a must read for any investigative lass.

For women in journalism, the undercurrent of sexism is always there and they’re often told to ignore it. Just focus on the story. Or manipulate it to your advantage (because women, you know, they are always about the feminine wiles and exploiting situations whenever possible). Definitely don’t complain, because if you do, you might get taken off the story and reassigned to the gardening desk. If you’re bothered that stories about women end up in the ‘life and style’ section you would do well to keep it to yourself, because no one wants to hear about it. The sexism is just an occupational hazard, you see, it is part of the job.

Katie Holmes uses her almighty Kegel muscles to squeeze the scoop out of her interviewees in Thank You For Smoking.

Nubby Twiglet has compiled a list of the best eye candy of the glossy variety. LOOK AT THE PURRDDYY.

Girl With a Satchel gives Cleo a high five for 10-page happiness special, but brandishes her digital wooden spoon for contradicting their soft-feminism with cover girl Beyonce’s bandaged body suit.

My new favourite website Autostraddle does the most hilariously accurate recap of the latest gay-centric episode of Pretty Little Liars. PLL is cat-nip for sapphic sisters – this show is FUCKING LADEN with lesbian undertones.

Spencer, you're looking very Shane today.

And to finish off your week with a ball-bashing to wet weather blues, here’s some wise words from all time bodacious babe Marilyn Monroe over at Yes and Yes.

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This week’s round-up of productive procrastination! Random tidbits, tasty morsels for the bored, food for the soul and social commentary.

Skechers is sexist and hates cupcakes – Uh, wow. This advertisement is all kinds of creepy. Don’t run from cupcakes, girls!. But maybe run away from a Candy BBQ.

Sistah be doin’ it for sistahood! Kristin Wiig has a new movie coming out, and it’s your duty as a 21st Century grrrl to go see it!

Speaking of female comedians, growing up, I was never a fan of the Roseanne show. Most of the jokes flew over my head and my father was king of the remote control anyways and the show wasn’t to his liking. Now I’m 23 (almost!), I possess the cynicism that one can only acquire with age, and now I kind of appreciate the wise-ass parents and the wise-ass kids. Roseanne wears flannel, she over-eats, makes fun of her children behind their backs and has this absurd love/hate relationship with her mother and sister. Roseanne really reveals how imperfect modern families are – and it’s hilarious! Love her or hate her, Roseanne Barr changed the comedy industry for women. But she had to play hard ball to do it.

It didn’t take long for me to get a taste of the staggering sexism and class bigotry that would make the first season of Roseanne god-awful. It was at the premiere party when I learned that my stories and ideas—and the ideas of my sister and my first husband, Bill—had been stolen. The pilot was screened, and I saw the opening credits for the first time, which included this: CREATED BY MATT WILLIAMS. I was devastated and felt so betrayed that I stood up and left the party. Not one person noticed.

Facebook in real life - Bright star Natalia (hola, girl!) over at Mamma Mia bought my attention to the Hungry Beast’s video. It’s about how Facebook’s codes of social etiquette fail to apply to real life situations. It’s funny, and I get the point they’re making. Why on earth are we broadcasting to the world that we’re drinking a slurpy? Or that we’re gay, or straight, or our favourite movie is fightclub, or our email server of choice? But the interwebs is not real life. And that’s what makes it so fun, and at times a little scary.

Which brings me to this post by Rachel Hills about the ‘”Ga-Ga-esque pyrotechnics” of the internet.

Sometimes the grubbiness runs deeper. A sense that what some people are saying, at least, is all bullshit; jostling; self-aggrandising. A product of a hope on their part that if you say something often enough, it will become true.

Part of the problem is what Mills touches upon in his post: the fact that social media is a public space. A more public space than the places we used to think of as public spaces, even. When it comes to social media, almost everything happens “on stage”. Even something like Facebook, which drew its initial appeal from the promise that it was a walled online garden where we could freely be ourselves, has long since become anything but that.

More privacy drama surrounding Facebook. The Sydney Morning Herald describes it as “‘men’s only” Facebook group” which “features hundreds of images of women in bikinis and lingerie, obtained from the personal Facebook photo albums of the members’ female friends”. One of the girls’ whose photos were uploaded without her consent said – “I’m a little bit angry, to be honest. If it was one of my friends who has copied a photo of me to put on a public website and not let me know then I’d feel extremely betrayed.” Unfortunately, there aren’t any laws at the moment outlawing the sharing of images from social media websites. I’m speculating that the owners of the Brocial Network will probably retaliate with a backlash against these women, who probably shouldn’t post these images because they’re all just asking for attention and should be flattered by their manliness and overwhelmingly mature response to the female form, right? I have photos on my facebook of myself in a bikini. I don’t post them for attention, or so all the boyz will lyk me and think I’m hawt. I think the Brocial Network is just another form of ‘slut-shaming’, and a means to ingrain this idea that female bodies are public property.

In defense of hipsters – I like bikes. Old bikes. I hate Ikea. I enjoy wearing ugly jumpers and some of the so called music I like is more akin to an orgy of broken computers. Does this make me a hipster? Maybe. But I also like Usher! And television! And sometimes I get my coffee from Gloria Jeans! Hipster-dom is starting to define my generation. That is, my generation is defining themselves with stuff from past generations. A disdain for capitalism and mass-manufacturing. Vintage furniture. Mustaches. Granny’s cardigans. Obscure music. Obscure type-faces. Obscure anything, really. But what exactly is so wrong with widening your tastes and exploring other than what is right in front of you?

The aesthetic is about being appreciative of things that have been made with care and consideration, like beautiful bikes and hand-crafted fonts. Not to take the piss or because they can’t think of anything new themselves, but because they appreciate things that were done well…in contrast to the mass-produced gunk they grew up around. Hipster culture cherry-picks the best of the new and the old.

The Emotional Guidance System – Sometimes, I feel like my days are ruled by polar opposite emotions. I feel either jubilant, or severely bed-ridden with pessimism and a severe case of Angry Princess Bitchface. I’m walking on sunshine or having an inner monologue about hating everyone and everything, including myself. Jetta’s post over at The Radical Uprise really helped me visual my emotions on the scale. She talks about Jerry and Esther Hick’s Emotional Guidance System, which kind of entails you to see your emotions as a kind of ladder. You gotta work up that thing if you wanna get to the top, sugar. I usually describe my moods as shit, less shit, pretty good and super-fucking great thank you sir, but this way’s a lot better.

Bin it, baby – As a reformed hoarder and an obsessive chucker-outerer (yes I made that word up. Copyright Camilla Peffer 2011 etc), I never shy away from preaching the benefits of simplistic living. When I moved to Perth a month ago, I was living out of a suitcase for three weeks. It’s surprising how much you can get by without. I really did have an urge to watch 500 Days of Summer so not having my DVD collection kind of sucked, but the quality of my life wasn’t exactly lacking or anything without it. When all my stuff arrived (one week late I might add!), I found myself listing a whole heap of unwanted clothes on eBay. Not sure why I ever had that puffy-sleeved gold Michael Jackson jacket.

How the Bachelor in Bugger All can help you get ahead – Whilst applying to universities this week (I got into Murdoch! Yay! But I really have my fingers crossed for Curtin!), I needed a reminder of why I’m putting myself through three years of caffeine induced brainstorming, midnight essays and often times cold, distant institutionalised learning. Does my distinction average really count for anything? Could I be doing something more? Sarah Von over at Yes and Yes says it’s all about the extra that provide the extra icing on your resume cake.

More than your degree, your work experience, personality, connections and work ethic will help you find a job. If you’ve got a few good internships, knowledge of the appropriate software, a friendly demeanor and a buddy in the company, it probably won’t matter if your degree is in underwater basket weaving – you’ll be in.

Who hasn’t worked a crummy job before? Who isn’t working a crummy job right now? The next time I take on a bottom rung position and find myself ordered to decorate bathrooms again, I’m going to remind myself of Melissa Febos’ story. We all start out somewhere as a worm beneath the dirt, so we may as well create some crazy anecdotes to impress aquaintances!

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