Before I dish out a week’s worth of webby goodness, I would like everyone to have a moment’s silence for mother. I was one of those difficult babies who decides to show up early, and at 3 in the morning 23-years-ago, I was born butt first. Ouch. I have been inflicting a similar style of inconvenience on my mother ever since, mainly in the form of stealing her jewellery, drinking all of her coffee, and only calling whenever I need money. And when she refuses my demands? “You were born butt first, Camilla.” Touche, mother, touche. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!

Returning to Slut Walks Roots – Rachel Rabbit White writes about losing the message amongst feminist politics. What exactly is a Slut Walk? We understand that it’s a global demonstration where girls are taking to the streets to protest against sexual violence. The marches started when a Toronto police officer remarked that it was the ‘slut’ clothes of rape victims that were to blame, and not the perpetrators themselves. So whilst harassment is never ok, and no means no and yes means yes, what is allowed, and what isn’t?

I’m not sure these guys are hearing SlutWalk means clothing choice does not = rape, but even that original message seems to have gotten murky. Some Slutwalkers have been quoted as saying “our outfit choices are not an invitation to come on to us” Quiet Riot Girl (last week’s metro-sexy guest poster) challenged this. On her twitter stream, she says “So some feminists believe all and any unsolicited /unwanted attention of women by men is ‘harassment’. Men have to wait to be asked/told to pay a woman any attention at all? Basically the Slutwalks are slutshaming hetero men.

How are men supposed to hit on women in public, talk to them or even ogle them? Because surely, ladies, we aren’t saying when we go out in a hot outfit we don’t want to be seen, or talked to by anyone. I think talking with men about what’s okay and what’s not–as well as talking with each other about what harassment is and isn’t– is necessary for this conversation. I’m honestly surprised it’s been left out of SlutWalk.

Photo: AP

Reclaiming slut and faggot – Mia Freeman is certainly wrangling shit storm over at Mama Mia! This post talks about the trend in reclaiming insults and using them as a battle cry, most recently seen with the famous international Slut Walks. My favourite word is cunt, and I detest its negative connotations. Cunt just means, vagina. Why is this an insult? Vaginas are awesome – they’re big strong muscles used for pushing out humans. Hooray for female genitalia!

Photo: Amber Forrester. Patch available on Etsy.com

The pros and cons of your natural winter woolies – This post is about pubes and body hair in general. To be fashionable or natural? That is the feminist question. Who are we shaving for? For society? Ourselves? Our boyfriends? I’m going to be frank. I shave to fit in. If I didn’t, I know society would treat me a different way. So while I applaud chicks who ditch the Schick and embrace the pits in all their natural glory, I’ll admit that I’m not that brave.

Blogger Beautiful? Radical self-love guru Gala Darling writers about the hypnotising, extravagant, magical world of fashion blogging, and the damage it may be having on young girls’ self esteem. The great thing about fashion blogging is that it makes the whole fashion world more attainable. You can create your own fashion shoots, and the blog serves a DIY publication. You have access to your readers and you can gauge their needs as consumers of your blog but directly engaging with them through comments. This is what makes fashion blogs a popular choice amongst the clothes horses of today – they’re taking inspiration from blogs rather than glossy magazines. But as advertisers and the fashion industry start wanting to work with fashion bloggers, the whole fashion blogging spectrum changes. In with the skinny models, out with the real girls.

99.9% of us are not models, & that is why so many of us love it! Blogs are where we go to get inspiration from what other girls are really wearing in their daily life. But as daily outfit pictures evolve into photoshoots & production values increase, more actual value — we’re talking $$$ here — is placed upon how we look. After all, for a lot of us, making money from our blog is the ultimate dream. Where does that money come from? Mostly, it comes from big companies with big budgets.

In a conversation with Karen from WhereDidUGetThat last week, I said, “Sometimes I think if I was skinnier I would get more work! & that’s CRAZY! I’m a writer, not a model!” It’s true that some very popular bloggers are much smaller today than when they started. Is it coincidence, or is it a carefully-orchestrated attempt to obtain (or maintain) success in this strange world? At some point, you have to ask yourself whether your health or your career is more important.

Photo: news.com.au

The news story on everybody’s lips this week – the Supre Jeggings campaign. Some are expressing outrage over the fashion crime of leggings cross-breeding with denim, but the main focus is over the fact that this ad, which features a very young girl in a pose more fitting for a soft-porn magazine. Wearing nothing but leggings and a full-mane of softly curled dark hair, she poses seductively with her thumb in her mouth. The model’s come-hither bedroom eyes and bare naked back suggest the ad might be for a more mature product, surely not a clothing line targeted at girls aged 12-18. Unfortunately, this is something Supre has been doing for years. I remember when I was thirteen and Supre was very rigour du jour amongst my peers. One week it was t-shirts with cheeky slogans like SPANK ME and NAUGHTY GIRL, the next it was tank tops with condoms sewn onto the front, with a slogan that read BREAK IN CASE OF EMERGENCY.

Nice girls get the corner office – Corporate coach Lois Frankel tells Aussie ladies to ditch the Pollyanna act and embrace their inner diva. Being nice is a good personality trait: it makes you more approachable and probably gets you more Christmas cards.  And who doesn’t like creating a shrine of joyous yuletide well wishes to the wonderful you? Unfortunately, sweetness needs to coupled with other personality traits.

“Women also often let people cross their boundaries inappropriately,” she said.

“They tolerate inappropriate behaviour and don’t walk away when they should.”

Dr Frankel said Australian culture encouraged “nice girls” rather than women who sought success in their careers and private lives.

“While American women are starting to get the fact they need to take better care of themselves and be more verbal and ask for what they want, Australian women are still hesitant to do that,” she said.

Ambivalent relationships may do more than dishearten. In a study published in 2003 Holt-Lunstad and Uchino asked 102 male and female volunteers to wear blood pressure monitors for three days. Every time a subject had a social interaction lasting more than five minutes, he or she would describe it in a diary and rate the quality of that relationship. Not surprisingly, blood pressure readings were typically higher when individuals encountered ambivalent friends than when they saw supportive friends. But intriguingly, blood pressure was also more elevated in the presence of ambivalent friends than it was with people the subjects disliked but could not avoid (such as classmates or co-workers). You expect very little from someone you loathe, Holt-Lunstad surmises, whereas ambivalent friends, unpredictable as they are, often raise your hopes only to dash them. And that disappointment, or fear of it, can negatively affect your health.

I’m sort of over relating my crotch to my place in the world.

In a recent interview on NPR’s Morning Edition, Mr. Albee said the following:“Maybe I’m being a little troublesome about this,” Albee tells NPR’s Renee Montagne, “but so many writers who are gay are expected to behave like gay writers and I find that is such a limitation and such a prejudicial thing that I fight against it whenever I can.”He also said:“A writer who happens to be gay or lesbian must be able to transcend self. I am not a gay writer. I am a writer who happens to be gay.” He continued by saying, “Any definition which limits us is deplorable.”Mr. Albee has been criticized for his remarks by many gay writers, artists and bloggers.  Yet, like Ms. Breslin, he was simply advocating for the most radical, most basic human right- the right to be fully himself, whatever that is and whatever it means.

There are people whose entire identity seems to hinge on being part of some extremely narrow social tranche (sexual, ethnic, gender, religious, etc.)  Sometimes I wonder if pulling an identity blanket over yourself is a just a way of avoiding the messy confusions and contradictions that come with being human.

Denying the gray areas can certainly make life easier.